>http://boards.4chan.org/mlp/thread/30470273 >Prompt: object immediately to your right is what's going to save Equestria) >Cats >The Mane 6, Luna and Celestia stare in astonishment as you chase Chrysalis around the throne room at speed. >You're screaming like a banshee and waving a stick that's smeared cat poo on the end. The one you're not holding. Because that would be weird and gross. >She's screaming herself because a few seconds you'd raced into the chamber with an overflowing catbox and threw it at her with uncanny accuracy, nailing her. You'd busted a wing so she's incapable of flying, and her horn is cracked, so no magic. >You'd ended the standoff right when she was monologuing. Now she's screaming in terror and trying to evade the deranged human. >She collides with a changeling warrior who's stumbling by with a paint can stuck on his head, for some reason, and then smashes headfirst into a statue. >"That's...eww," says Pinkie, wincing. "That had to smart." Chryssi is getting up just in time to avoid being smacked with your poo-stick. >Two changeling warriors charge their horns and fire at you. They miss and hit each other instead, setting each other on fire. . >One runs blindly at a balcony, colliding with four more and setting them alight before they can get out of the way, and all five of them fall, screaming. >Another changeling, thinking quickly, throws the nearest liquid-containing container at the other burning changeling in their midst. This turns out to be a bottle of spirits from the drinks table. The result in an unconscious, burning heap and several more screaming, blazing changelings. >"I--I feel like we should be doing something here," says Twilight. Dash is laughing too hard to talk. >"Do we help Anon, or the Changelings?" says Applejack. Several Changeling warriors try shooting at Anon, only to hit Chrysalis, air or each other. >Several collide in the air overhead in their haste to help their queen and everyone is astonished to see them tie up in an actual brawl, screaming and cursing at each other. >A burning changeling throws himself into the banquet's chocolate fountain, knocking it over, as several others are trying to get in position to help their queen, and all of them collide, slip and fall in the huge mess. >The changeling with the bucket on his head wanders by. "Uh...guys? Guys? Little help here?" he says plaintively, his voice muffled. "I can't see what's going on. Guys?" >"I think we're all /avoiding the elephant in the room. Why is Anon NAKED?" asks Rarity. No one can answer her. Luna is cackling harder than even Dash. Celestia's jaw is slack, and her eyebrows have climbed all the way up to her maneline as she takes in the spectacle. >She looks as if she wants to laugh or intervene, but can't quite make up her mind. She settles for smothering some of the fires with her magic before they can spread. >"I think I'm actually fascinated," says Twilight, wonderingly. "I think I want to see how this plays out. It's like a trainwreck--you don't want to see it but you can't bring yourself to look away." >"He IS doing an amazing amount of damage," says Celestia. "It's most impressive." Chryssi races by wailing--this time you're sitting on her back, backwards, and screaming while you spank her with the poo-stick. She's scattering her own forces like bowling pins. Her mane is burning. "We should probably stop this, at least before anypony else gets hurt, but...let's let it go for a few more minutes." >It's a Three Stooges kind of day >http://boards.4chan.org/mlp/thread/30470273 >Prompt: object immediately to your right is what's going to save Equestria) >Wall The Wall that saved Equestria >>30475215 >"What does my little human have, hmmm?" >"Back off, man, I've got THIS." You step aside with a flourish and gesture grandly. >Tirek stares at you incredulously. "It's....a wall?" >"Yeah. A wall." >"An ordinary wall. Made of red brick." >"Yeah." >"And what, pray tell, is this supposed to do?" >"It's a wall, and it's gonna kick your ass." >Tirek stares at you, the wall, and then back at you. "I'm...how? How is this supposed to work, again?" >"By human asskicking magic. I have huge magic, the best." >Tirek cocks his head and stares at you. You stare back. >Somewhere a dog barks. >"So...when does this magical human asskicking actually start?" he asks you, his brow climbing up. >You glare at him. "It takes a while. Sometimes. But it's coming, guy, you betcha." >Tirek stares at you and the wall. He looks at a watch. Finally he shrugs and sits down beside you. >You both stare at the wall. >You're eating some cashews out of a bag. Wordlessly you offer him some. He accepts. >You munch on cashews in silence for a while, staring at the wall. >"It's a very nice wall. For a wall, I mean," he finally says. >"Yeah." ">I'm not an expert on walls though." >"Me either. It's pretty nice, though." >"Yeah." >"Do you think it'll be much longer?" he asks. He eats some more cashews. >"Maybe. Sometimes it takes a while." >A curious bystander pony comes up, having finally gotten over the worst of his fear, since a whole lot of nothing appears to be happening after Tirek's sudden appearance. "So.. what's going on?" >"Waiting," you say. "Wall's gonna kick Tirek's ass." >"Oh." he stares at you, Tirek, and the wall. "When?" >"Any time now. It might be a while though. It's a slow thing, but when it gets started, watch out." >"You sure about that? because it looks like a pretty ordinary wall." >"That's what I said," Tirek says. >"It's not just any wall, it's the wall that's going to kick Tirek's ass across Equestria," you say. "You just have to believe." >"Ah." he sits down. "You know, I think I want to see this." >the three of you stare. At least until the newcomer gets up and trots off. A few minutes later he comes back with a few cans of soda. He tosses one to you and tirek and sits down with his. >Pretty sure you're joined by a second pony, an earth pony mare. "What in hell's going on?" >"Wall," says the pony beside you, gesturing. >I can see that, but...seriously, what?" >"It's gonna kick Tirek's flank," he says. >"Exactly." you say. >"Uh...when is this supposed to happen?" she says, after a few seconds of silence. >"That's what *I* wanted to know!" says Tirek. >"Sometimes it takes a while," says the pony sitting beside you. >Shrugging, she sits down beside you all to watch. >And so it goes, for quite some time. >Be Celestia >You arrive with your sister and as much magical backup as you could get to find several thousand ponies, sitting and staring at an ordinary brick wall patiently. There are musicians playing in the backround. Several bands have set up stages. the air is filled with the smells of hot snacks from concession stands. >Some ponies are wandering off to listen to the bands, or get snacks or drinks before wandering back to stare at the wall fixedly. >Several ponies are doing magic tricks, or juggling, or tossing hacky-sacks around. >A pony is hawking "I WAS AT THE WALL" T-shirts. Another is selling wall plushies. >Several ponies are holding "WALL/FLOOR LAMP FOR PARLIAMENT '17!" signs. >This...isn't what you were expecting to see. >"It does not seem to be a crisis, dear sister," says Luna, munching on a very large fried cake cleverly shaped like a tesselated wall. She's wearing a Wall-shaped cap, and has her very own "I WAS AT THE WALL AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY T-SHRT" shirt. >Anon and tirek are still sitting in front of the assembly, staring at the wall, only they're wearing Wall caps and munching on fried food on sticks and drinking cups of beer. They appear to be having a peaceful, pleasant conversation. Anon says something, and Tirek bursts into guffaws. >You're millenia old, and yet...you're still at a loss for words. You see several guardsponies walking by with snacks or wall-shaped plushies. They're...strangely cute. >You finally shrug. The snacks smell pretty good, so...why not? >What the hell. "I'll have one of those wall-shaped cake-things," you say to the nearest vendor. >"Vanilla, chocolate or butterscotch?" he asks. >"Chocolate, of course," you say. And behold, it was good. >And that's how the Wall saved Equestria. http://boards.4chan.org/mlp/thread/30541899 Prompt: Lyra has a weird mania for eating spiders, for some reason. >Lyra's turn to cook tonight. >You've been living with her for a year, and she's sweet, funny, and agreeably kooky. >You also detest spiders. Can't stand the little buggers >So, Lyra gets rid of them for you. You were grateful...until you saw exactly how she was doing that. Like, an hour ago. >She didn't know you were looking. She just chewed once and swallowed it down >You could barely keep from gagging when you saw it >She's a little weird about her medications, too. Keeps them in the fridge. On a hunch, you checked the bottles >And sure enough, one of them contained fresh spiders. Big ones. >She's at the table with you, plowing through her seafood tempura with gusto. >You're picking at yours, trying not to imagine that the crispy little things are actually spiders, and not, as Lyra calls them, "Softshell Gryphonica Red Spider crabs." >And damned if they don't look like the ones in the big bottle. >And even worse...they're delicious. They're about your favorite dish since coming to Equestria, and she cooks them a lot. >She notices you're not eating. "What's wrong, Anon?" she asks, concern in her voice. "You normally inhale this when I fix it. Is everything okay?" >You look down at the plate of crunchy fried "spider crabs" and the seafood salad beside it, and back at her. Her face reflects her worry. "I'm...a little off my feed tonight," you say. >You aren't lying. Your face is distinctly greenish. "I think lunch is disagreeing with me a bit. Uh...do you want this? Don't want it to go to waste," you say. >Her face softens. She smiles. "True that," she says. "They're pretty pricy. I get a good deal on them, but yeah, let's not waste them." You slide the plate over to her and she munches through them. >later, in bed, after an energetic session of lovemaking, you find yourself staring at the dark ceiling for a long, long time.